i'm watching you.
a serious topic and a serious-er topic:
you know how sometimes the grasses and hedges get so far out of control that you need to send in the professionals along with reinforcement to do the work? so i went to get my eyebrows done again today.
the lady was so sweet - letting me in as she was pulling the metal gate over the glass doors to close for the day. i think she took pity on me seeing the condition of my face.. fail moment of the day: as she set about working, she peers at my face and says mmmyeahh i'm gonna have to do your forehead too. guess that's a mild side effect of having mountain people blood in me =/
i've been going through a bible study series with some ladies at church and it's so good. i'm kinda all over the place with thoughts all jumbled up, but i thought i'd share a couple from this week that goes along with my no guts, no glory deal.
the last few months in sunday school, we'd been watching videos that go through the journey of finding god in the desert. it could just be production tactics - timely pauses and dramatic orchestration, ray vanderlaan's voice of depth and intensity, but every time i watch it, a boulder weighs heavily on my lungs so hard that held-back tears roll down my nasolacrimal ducts turning me into a mess of snot.
because the truth is, oftentimes i feel like i'm stuck in the biggest desert of my life right now. how come none of my dreams are coming true?!? but i'm reminded through the OT that just as he led the israelites through the desert, he leads, protects and provides for me too. and like the sudden floods that unexpectedly overtake our paths, he responds to my calls when i turn into mopeballz. and though it seems like barren land sometimes, i am well fed as i follow his voice. now back to my lady study. one particular verse made all that clear:
i remember the devotion of your youth, how as a bride you loved me and followed me through the desert, through a land not sown. jeremiah 2:2what is a person in love willing to do? ANYTHING! wholly devoted and eager to follow into the unknown. no money? no problem! no job? no problem! no home? no problemO!! as long as i got you! i dunno that i've known .love. but i may just as easily give up any sign of reluctance in the name of like.
so then if i am christ's bride and i love him, how much more willing should i be to follow wherever he leads - no matter how unsown the territory. in love i enter knowing he is the ancient of days, the same truths he promised to the israelites will stand for me today too. nice!
i will make rivers flow into barren heights and springs within the valleys. i will turn the desert into pools of water and parched grounds into springs. isaiah 41:18and hey, who knows. maybe practicing following god into wilderness will help overcome my fear of following earthly men. but alas, another story for another day ;)