Wednesday, March 30, 2011

snuffle bear says hi brenda



i think it's a girl thing.. to have weird obsession with pillows.  it's recently come to my attention that i have way too many pillows on my bed.  even though it's a gigumbus queen size bed with more room than i could possibly need, much of the surface area is occupied by my collection of pillows.  a little ridiculous - i find myself sleeping gingerly around my pillows in fear that i might accidentally push one over into the dark trenches between my bed and the wall.  last night i took three of the puffier ones out and found it to be a very liberating experience.

so out of the kindness of my heart, i'd like to donate my extra pillows to anyone who needs one.  any takers?  ^_<

secondly, this morning i turned on the tv to watch the news only to find that the only non-infomercial segment that airs this time of day is the view.  i used to watch it when lisa ling was one of the hosts many many years ago.  (go azn ppl!!)  surprisingly, barbara walters is still on the show.  she must be about 100 years old by now.  anyone else watch 20/20 every friday night when you were a kid?!

anyways, the topics on the show today nearly made me hurl.  (good thing i didn't cuz my breakfast was really good)  first topic on the show: 10 things mothers should never feel guilty about.  items ranged from choosing your work over your kids, lying to other moms about your kids, wanting to desert your kid after they puke all over you..  granted i have no idea what it's like to mother a small child but i hear it's not easy.  the problem with these discussions is that while they sympathize with women on the hardships with motherhood, they don't give them any sort of substantial encouragement on pressing on with their role.  instead, they tell women exactly what they want to hear, assure them that it's okay to feel selfish and justify their behavior.

topic two:  they hosted a lady who chose her career over her family and is now generating lots of heat over her decision.  this lady married her childhood sweetheart, decided she never wanted to have kids, but because of her husband, had 2 boys.  she later travels to japan for a couple months to write her book, comes back and decides she really doesn't want kids afterall, divorces her husband, and says her now 13 and 15 year old boys completely understand her decision to leave.  uhh.. i wouldn't be surprised if her boys fall into the 10+% of americans on antidepressants.  the hosts graciously thank her for being brave in offering an alternative view on the female role, seeing as they are sort of a woman empowerment segment, but it's really quite disturbing.

scary to think there are thousands of women at home right now watching this show and taking it all in.  ehh  oh well.  i get off my soapbox and get ready for work now.

pillows anyone?!?!


Tuesday, March 29, 2011

seasons are changing


High protein breakfast for my grueling workout commute to work. Starts with yogurt and granola and then a whole wheat English muffin with a fried egg, Italian style meatloaf and melted Toscano cheese. I would've had milk instead of orange juice but sometimes milk does funny things to my stomach.

I haven't filled out a job application in nearly 4 years.


Thursday, March 24, 2011

heaven's tree


started a new blog.  collaboratively this time  = ] 

this is how it came about:

mike sent an email out to sac small group about a book he'd recently picked up.  (i wonder what keywords he was searching to come across this book ^_< )

i was browsing the kindle store and found this book- "Calm My Anxious Heart: A Woman's Guide to Finding Contentment" - it's the highest rated free kindle book on amazon. despite the title i downloaded and read the first chapter- it seems pretty good and applicable to both men and women. the good thing about a kindle book is that there's no cover, so if someone asks you what you're reading you can say "uhhhhhhh........ i'm reading about cars. isn't the subaru impreza STI amazing...." anyways, hope this helps someone. isn't it weird how we can be so blessed materially yet struggle with contentment?

it turns out osmond had read it as well.  osmond reads a lot.  he writes,

I realize that Christian men miss out on a lot of really good material if we ignore the things women  have written.  Calm My Anxious Heart is one of the best books I have read.  I have just about every page highlighted.  It is intensely God-honoring, practical, relevant, Biblically-based, and uplifting.  

we wanted to start an email thread where we can share our thoughts about the book but decided that email spamming everyone probably isn't the most effective route of communication.  so a blog was suggested.  wallaaaaah!  hope you all will visit it and see what's going on over there.

and don't forget to comment!!  ..you may have noticed, i'm very blog oriented.  or rather, my thoughts are more constructive in writing than in real-time dialogue.  i always thought it'd be cool if there was a place online for people to share their thoughts and other fun things they see/hear/learn every day - seeing as most of us are in front of a computer all day at work  hehe  anyways, love to hear from you :D

lemme know if you want to be a contributor too!


rain is good for:

* free car wash
* excellent conditions for wearing rainboots
* better crop yields for the season, which hopefully means lower produce prices =/
* excuse for a bad hair day
* cheeseball asian music

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

being good


Interesting.. having completed my 32-point parallel park job on I street (lightly tapping the pick up in front of me to squeeze into the space), I got out and thanked the Lord that no one was around to witness the event. As I stuck my hands into my pockets and bowed my hooded head against the wind, an older lady from behind me caught up with my pace to say she wanted to remind me to pay for parking, but then remembered that it's actually free after 6pm. So nice!

This is how the rest of brief meeting went down.

"Thanks for being so considerate! Have a good night!!"

"You too, dear. Be good. Don't be a bad girl. Remember your mom. Remember your mom!!"

"I will, thanks..."

My first thought.. where does she think I'm going?? I won't tell you ^_< Second thought, I called my mom this morning after a mild freak out moment while at work. Bah.

And finally, I thought.. this lady probably has in her mind that when your mom is on your conscience, then the possibility of committing any matters of mischief are out of question. Could be true.. maybe. But I was thinking, if not for God, what gives anyone any reason to be good?

Our current culture has adapted a morality by majority belief, which doesn't really answer the question since we as humans, are inherently flawed (or just sinful) and therefore cannot form the distinction between right and wrong on our own. Again, depends on what side of the boat you're on..

Surely you have heard of him and were taught in him in accordance with the truth that is in Jesus. You were taught, with regard to your former life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by your deceitful desires, to be new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.  Ephesians 4

Thank you ssg :)

Friday, March 18, 2011

torn. over a toilet seat.

That was my doing. I almost wanted to add a follow up message saying something to the effect of ::your future wife will appreciate you even more:: but decided I'd rather not live with the fear of getting girl-slapped every time I leave my room.

I hold strongly to my statement that as a visiting guy, you should respect the lady's room and return it to its original condition upon completion of your business. No exceptions.

But I wonder.. would I have any grounds for argument when the home is shared between a guy and girl? On an all-female floor it seems pretty straight forward and logical that the seat remains down. But when the bathroom becomes equally shared between two people, what right do I have to demand that the seat always be down for me - just cuz that's how I like it?

The inconvenience of having to put the seat down is just the same for the opposing party. In fact now that I think about it, the guys have it really bad! Not only would he be putting the seat down after use, but prior to, he'd have to lift it to start! That's double seat lifting action!

I'm not ready to say that I feel bad for the guy just yet, but I'm starting to question my expectations. Such a dilemma! What do you all think?
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Monday, March 14, 2011

ever feel completely useless?
well turns out, we are.
i hate watching the news but then i think, if i don't, i'm just being completely ignorant and made even more useless by not devoting at least a thought to people in need.  so i watch.  and my insides feel like they want to come out.

in new york on saturday, a tragic bus crash killed and injured all passengers aboard.  if not earthquake, then floods.  if not sickness, then accidents.  life is so delicate.  beautiful in its intricacies, but like a spider web, prone to destruction by the simple passing of lawn sprinklers.  why do i get a chance?



One thing I know that I have found
Through all the troubles that surround
You are the Rock that never fails, You never fail
One thing I know that I believe
Through every blessing I receive
You are the only One that stays, You always stay

You never change, You're still the same
You are the Everlasting God
You will remain after the day is gone and the things of earth have passed
Everlasting God
 keep talking to our father today..

Sunday, March 13, 2011

can't remember...


i frequently equate my memory capacity to that of a hamster -- and for good reason.  my short-term memory sucks.  meaning i usually find myself having to turn off my car, run back into the house and up the stairs to my room because i'd forgotten to grab the very reason why i was in the car in the first place.  i've come out of the grocery store with exactly what i didn't go in for.  i instantaneously lose my train of thought the moment it enters my head.  this list can get really long but i'll stop for the sake of not forgetting why i logged into my blog  >_< 

on wednesday this week, i'm going in for an MRI of my brain and i'm really excited.  i'm volunteering my noodles for someone's research at UCDMC, but mostly i just want to see what my brain looks like.  funny thing, when i was young i used to wish i could be diagnosed with a learning disability or some kind of brain abnormality.  i thought it'd be much easier to blame a neurological malfunction for having to try so much harder learning math compared to other kids. 

on the flip side, my long-term memory is kind of a super hero compared to its shorter counterpart.  it'd be nice if i could remember really important things like the sum total of 6 years worth of chinese school and maybe biochem.  but instead, i have this weird selective memory where the things that occupy precious space in my brain for years to come are mostly frivolous and trivial.  things like knowing apple juice gives kids diarrhea because of excess sorbitol =/  same with chewing lots of gum.

but i'm thinking maybe i can harness this super power of mine for good rather than letting it become a storehouse of extraneous facts.  anyone have any tips on how to voluntarily force things into my hippocampus?

Thursday, March 10, 2011

postcard from fairy land





Today I vacuumed, picked flowers, cooked, and read. And sometimes I'd devote a few moments to writing my paper and working on my stack of research approval forms.

And now it's lunch time and I'm back to reading ^____^

"How far have you got?" asked Curdie.

"I've got about the half away, but the other half is ever so much bigger."

"I don't think you will have to move the lower half.  Do you see the slab laid up against the wall?"

Irene looked, and felt about with her hands, and soon perceived the outlines of the slab.

"Yes," she answered, "I do."

"Then, I think," rejoined Curdie, "when you have cleared the slab about halfway down, or a bit more, I shall be able to push it over."

"I must follow my thread," returned Irene, "whatever I do."

"What do you mean?" exclaimed Curdie.  "You will see when you get out," answered the princess, and went on harder than ever.

But soon she was satisfied that what Curdie wanted done and what the thread wanted done were one and the same thing.  For she not only saw that by following the turns of the thread she had been clearing the face of the slab, but that, a little more than halfway down, the thread went through the chink between the slab and the wall into the place where Curdie was confined, so that she could not follow it until the slab was out of her way.  As soon as she found this, she said in a right joyous whisper:

"Now, Curdie, I think if you were to give a great push, the slab would tumble over."

"Stand quite clear of it, then," said Curdie, "and let me know when you are ready."

Irene got off the heap, and stood one side of it. "Now Curdie!" she cried.

Curdie gave a great rush with his shoulder against it.  Out tumbled the slab on the heap, and out crept Curdie over the top of it.

"You saved my life, Irene!" he whispered.

"Oh, Curdie, I'm so glad!  Let's get out of this horrid place as fast as we can."
The Princess and the Goblin, George MacDonald


Thursday, March 3, 2011

today we learn the alphabet



it is quite possible that i have the best brother on earth.
he gets me  ^___^  he also gives great advice.
also, why are pandas so freaking cute?


and something for your brain/heart to munch on this thursday evening:  (don't worry, to be fair there's an alphabet for both guys and girls)

If you're a woman dating someone or considering it, ask yourself, Is he:
  • A -- Accountable
  • B -- a Believer
  • C -- Courageous
  • D -- Discerning
  • E -- an Example for other, younger men
  • F -- Faithful
  • G -- Gentle, Generous
  • H -- Husbandlike
  • I -- an Initiator
  • J -- Just
  • K -- Kind
  • L -- a Leader
  • M -- Masculine
  • N -- Noble
  • O -- Obedient to God
  • P -- able to Provide
  • Q -- Quick-witted
  • R -- Resourceful
  • S -- a Sage
  • T -- Trustworthy
  • U -- Under Authority
  • V -- Vigorous
  • W -- a good Worker
  • X -- eXcellent in his efforts
  • Y -- Yearning for God
  • Z -- Zealous for righteousness

And not to forget, we ladies have much to strive for as well!
  • A -- Aware; of the big picture, of the world around her
  • B -- a Believer
  • C -- open to having Children
  • D -- Dignified
  • E -- Excellent in her pursuits
  • F -- Full of Faith
  • G -- Gracious
  • H -- Honorable
  • I -- Inventive
  • J -- Just
  • K -- Kind
  • L -- Loving
  • M -- Modest
  • N -- Noble
  • O -- Obedient to the authority in her life
  • P -- Pure
  • Q -- capable of being Quiet
  • R -- Resourceful
  • S -- Skilled, Stable
  • T -- Trustworthy
  • U -- Under Authority
  • V -- Victorious
  • W -- a Worshipper
  • X -- an eXample to others
  • Y -- Yearning for God
  • Z -- full of Zoe "life of God"

Tuesday, March 1, 2011


umm..  i don't really have much to say so you get another playlist.


Bruno Mars - Count On Me
Priscilla Ahn - Dream
Plain White Ts - Rhythm of Love
Boys Like Girls - Two Is Better Than One
Hillsong - Bones


save the last one, i should probably stay away from songs like these..